 It's for your own consumptionThe good chefs dress in black, remember that, just in case you seen an aswang and want omelets. These are the graphic chronicles of two men, Chops and Burns, collectively known as the Chefs in Black, who seek out the world's most exotic foods. Created by Cliff N. Hansen (Publisher of The Sláinte Magazine and award-winning designer of 42) and Tim Harnett (author of Trompe L'oeil and the upcoming Rêve), these comics have been described as "Anthony Bourdain meets hentai." Issues are released monthly on or around the seventeenth. The black and white versions are free downloads (free as in beer) with a Creative Commons license. Unfortunately every issue is password protected. As artists and publishers, a password is a pain in the balls. But, unfortunately our whiskey-money comes from teaching and as teachers we need to prevent our schools and students from accessing these, so fuckadoodledoo. Also, certain religious groups--I'm not naming names here--like to place fatwahs on people who make fun of their imaginary friend. So, if this is a party you're comfortable joining, please email for the password. The password is the same for each issue. A full-color printed compilation of the first volume of Chefs in Black will be available next year! |
Volume Two: Chefs in the CityWhile we have the following issues written, they aren't drawn yet so may be subject to some change.
2.0
Browned Charlie (Video!)
Chops and Burns go to Vietnam to find and cook a creature known as Charlie.Coming New Years Eve!
2.1
Death Dumplings
Chops moves on in the wake of Burns' death with an unexpected ally.Coming January 17, 2011!
2.2
Dining on Doppelgängers
A rival restaurant serving mythological meats has opened!Coming February 17, 2011!
2.3
Golum Goulash
Chops and Joe Biden serve creatures that will get the authors firebombed.Coming St. Patrick's Day, 2011!
2.4
Gourmet God with Cerebis Stew
How to you infiltrate the most guarded afterlife? With Saudi passports!Coming April 17, 2011!
2.5
Medusa Merlot
The Chefs and a Cub Scout pack attempt to capture medusa.Coming May 17, 2011!
2.6
Kraken Calamari
Why won't the Amazons fuck Chops as they hunt a sea monster?Coming June 17, 2011!
2.7
Vegan Vitals
The protested Chefs search for a vegetable lamb.Coming July 17, 2011!
2.8
Norse Nosh
Hunting food in Iceland's great since it's already in a freezer!Coming August 17, 2011!
2.9
Nessie Nuggets
There are motherfucking medusas loose on the motherfucking plane!Coming Darney Day, 2011!
2.10
Puffing the Magic Dragon
You've heard the rumors, but is it true?Coming October 17, 2011!
2.11
Sasquatch Sandwich
Bigfoot's been sighted and the Chefs want to serve him on rye!Coming November 17, 2011!
1.12
Two Presidents, One Grail
Do we hear wedding bells for one of the Chefs?Coming December 17, 2011! |
Warning
These comics contain copious and gratuitous nudity, perverse sexual situations, mullets, alcohol abuse, bestiality, drug use, violence, masageny, fecal humor, man-on-satyr sodomy, heresy, redundancy, libel, slander, jingoism, bigamy, racism, incitement of civil unrest, witchcraft, heresy, redundancy, bad puns, bullying, draft-dodging, terrorism, unrepentant socialist sympathies, an awkward unreturned love toward Richard Dawkins, Holocaust denial, Zionism, Advocacy for the reunification of the Dakota Territories, blasphemy, pro-IRA sentiment, anti-IRA sentiment, teen angst, bitterness, McCarthyism, disco-fever, refusal to floss, Bluegrass, shark jumping, and Muppets.
These comics are definitely NSFW. They are probably not safe for home either. They should not be read by children, pregnant women, women who are operating heavy machinery, women who may become pregnant with heavy machinery, women pregnant by heavy machinery, Muslims, Christians, or Jews...except for the Hollywood Jews who we will sell out to faster that you can say "that whole Hollywood Jew thing is a racist myth." It's all for the purposes of parody, satire, and a good drunken laugh. Please don't kill us!
Unfortunately this series is no longer legal in the otherwise wonderful nation of Ireland. Please protest that ridiculous new anti-blasphemy law!
Unfortunately this series is also no longer legal in Australia, a nation with pornography laws as upside-down as their maps. Please protest the law forbiding nude images of consenting adult women with A-cup breast sizes.
Reviews
"Chefs in Black is the perfect mix of weird and awesome. Falling somewhere in that small gray border-land between brilliant and insane, Chefs in Black is a wonderful marriage of literature (akin to what mass murderers might write) and art (of the sort a developmentally disabled kindergartner might draw). Read this comic at your own risk."
-JW
"LOL. Disturbing? Yes. But also VERY funny...."
-MG
"Shew! Okay, you're fucking brilliant."
-MM
"Pretty good. I'm a little confused, but I really look forward to the new editions...can't wait to see more!"
-NM
"Perversion...doesn't bother me and your warning had me giggling out loud...you have given sufficient warning to avoid any future blame or lawsuits from me."
-MR
"Thanks for all the fun. I liked the comics. I shared them with [my girlfriend] and she just kind of starred at me."
-JB
"I enjoyed the first page...the bit with the copyright."
-MT